Day 04- A habit that you wish you didn’t have
The only habit that I really really wish I didn’t have is that I worry so much. This specifically happens at night when I’m in bed and I’ve just closed my eyes to go to sleep. As soon as I try to relax, all these thoughts start going through my head. All the things that I haven’t done yet, the things that I forgot to do, thinking that the things that I have done weren’t good enough. I worry about what people think of me, about the stupid and embarrasing things I have done in the past 22 years of my life. I think about all the negative possibilities that could happen in my life. I think about failing my degree or writing a crap research report. I worry and worry and worry and worry.
I try to turn my brain of by firmly saying to myself “NO. Just No. Stop thinking. It’s OK.” and then I sing a song or something. If this doesn’t help, I turn the light back on and read my book some more.
What really sucks about this is that my worrying causes stress and the stress causes me to clamp my jaw shut while I’m sleeping. So instead of waking up all refreshed and what not, I wake up with a painful jaw and sore teeth. It sucks ass I tell you.
I really need to start doing meditation or something.